The FORBIDDEN Death Battle Prediction Blog Episode 28

 

Prediction 10

 

Spider-Gwen vs Batgirl

 

Okay. First thing first, technically Spider-Gwen’s supername is Ghost Spider, but no one actually calls her that. You tell someone that Ghost Spider is fighting Batgirl, they ask “who’s Ghost Spider?”

 

Well…here we are at the episode right before the penultimate, which is likely to be Sanji vs Rock Lee, and it’s awful. The worst part is that it’s predictably awful. This season has been a bumpy ride, and that’s putting it mildly.

 

Death Battle, dudes, what happened to those bright young men that would do Bucky O’ Hare vs Fox McCloud just to do Bucky O’ Hare vs Fox McCloud? Now you’re chasing normie clicks with obvious squash matches. If you’re going to do Spider-girl vs Bat-girl, at least have the dignity of feeding Babs to Jessica Drew. Instead, she’s going to die to this generation’s Anya Corazon.

 

I know what you’re thinking. “Who’s Anya Corazon?”

 

Exactly.

 

Let’s not pretend that the Spiderverse movie is going to prevent Spider-Gwen from sliding off into obscurity in a decade.

 

Just Tell Us Who Wins. Get it Over With

 

You remember Batman vs Spider-man? Watch it again but imagine they both have tits. There you go. It’s weaker Spidey with fewer feats vs weaker Batman with fewer feats. The Spidey-girl wins.

 

Some people say that because Spider-Gwen uses a symbiote that she can get screwed over with sonic batarangs like how Nightwing’s sonic wingdings screwed over Daredevil who had a weakness to sonics.

 

But sonics are only GG for symbiote users that rely on their symbiotes for their powers. Cletus and Eddie are screwed if they’re separated from their symbiotes because beneath the alien goo, they’re just normal people. But Spider-Gwen was bit by that radioactive spider. It’s like if Batman fought black suit Spidey and threw a sonic batarang. The symbiote would come off, but then Batman would have to contend with an angry and naked Peter Parker.

 

Oh god.

 

Is that it?

 

Is that why we’re getting this fight?

 

Ben wants to see naked Gwen break Babs’ back and rip her head off?

 

It must be all that pent-up lust. He hasn’t been able to satisfy his ryona fetish since Wonder Woman vs She-Ra. It’s like a tidal wave bursting through a dam.

 

The Autopsy Report

 

The fight isn’t anything to talk about, but the booking is.

 

Why did this abomination happen?

 

I’ve already covered the “Ben gets his kicks” angle and the normie bait angle, but there are others.

 

Miles and Eddie both bought it this season. This fight might be a sop to Spider-fans. It also gives DC its second loss in a row. One more loss and DC gets a losing streak. Ben and friends have talked on the podcast about how they don’t like DC’s two extra-long winning streaks. This fight might indicate that they’re going to feed Bat-family characters to the woodchipper for a time to give DC a losing streak to counter their winning streaks. If you see something like Damian Wayne vs Killua next season, you’ll know why.

 

Well. Kicking pirate vs Kicking ninja is likely the penultimate, though if they actually do it for the finale I won’t be too surprised given how this season has gone. That means the only matchup we don’t know is the finale.

 

Fingers crossed it’s a good one.

 

Come on Ben. Give us Galactus vs Unicron. You owe it to us. 2020 has been enough of a shit year. We don’t need the Death Battle season finale adding to the garbage fire.